We Tasted 7 of the Worst Cocktails Because How Bad Could They Be?

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Ever since man first mixed alcoholic drinks together, other men have mixed gross things together and dared the first man to drink it. The seven drinks below have appeared on multiple “Worst Cocktail” lists floating around the web. But are they really that bad?

 

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Immediate Reactions

Hannah: That is delicious. I’m not kidding. That tastes so good. I will drink the rest of this. It’s really spicy, though.

 

Mike: It tastes like Worcestershire sauce. If you like the taste of Worcestershire sauce, then you’ll love the taste of Worcestershire sauce with rum in it.

 

Final Thoughts

Hannah: I’d definitely drink it again if like, someone said my family’s life is on the line or something. It was pretty good. Definitely tasted like really, really bad boozy steak. Made out of liquid and rum.

 

 

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Immediate Reactions

Hallie: It’s chewy. I didn’t anticipate the chew. It’s kind of like a bloody Mary with something to chew on.
Mike: No. That texture is awful.
Hannah: That is TERRIBLE. It tastes like vomit. It tastes like a Bloody Mary coming back up.
Hallie: Oh. Well now that you say that… Oh, you’re right.

 

 

Final Thoughts

Hallie: It tasted fine until I started thinking about vomit. Then it was the worst thing in the world.

 

 

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Immediate Reactions

Mike: It tastes like exactly what it is. It tastes like you drink a lot of Jager, and then you’re left with a spoonful of mayonnaise in your mouth that you slowly swallow. There’s no symphony of flavors.

 

 

Final Thoughts

Mike: I expected this to be greasy and thick and coat my throat, but the two ingredients never really mixed. It’s like taking  a shot of Jager and chasing it with a spoonful of mayonnaise, so it is exactly as gross as eating a spoonful of mayonnaise.

 

 

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Immediate Reactions

Abbi: It tastes like a snow cone!
Rosie: Let’s do another. Keep ‘em coming.
Abbi: The lime juice is super tart, but- ew, no, now it tastes like underwear.
Rosie: It’s curdling as it goes down.
Abbi: Yeah, it’s got a bad aftertaste.
Rosie: Not too awful, not too awful.
Abbi: It’s okay. 6 out of 10.

 

 

Final Thoughts

Abbi: I thought I was getting the shaft and that it would be hard to swallow, but it turns out the pleasure was all mine. I mean I had a ball! I think I got off easy with this one. Penis.
Rosie: Honestly, not bad. If this was how all sperm tasted, I’d be a very drunk man.

 

 

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Immediate Reactions

 

 

Final Thoughts

Dave: I’ll be honest, I went into my drink with a lot of confidence. I love hot sauce, I love mayonnaise and I love vodka, but I underestimated the little shit pepper packet that sat atop the mayonnaise dollop. I write this email at 11am the following morning and my stomach is still uneasy. Fingers a bit numb.

 

 

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Immediate Reactions

Alex: Yeah, that is not good. I kind of feel like the ocean’s mad at me. This is disgusting.Another sip Yeah, this isn’t good. I wouldn’t recommend it.
Mike: It’s bad. It’s weirdly bitter. Maybe from the tuna juice. It doesn’t taste as fishy as I thought it would.
Rosie: Immediately spits it up.

 

 

Final Thoughts

Alex: It tasted like retribution for every time I’ve urinated into the sea.

 

 

We Tasted 7 of the Worst Cocktail Because How Bad Could They Be - Image 1

 

Immediate Reactions

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