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Avoid embarrassment by following these simple steps.

1. Subtlety is the key.

Subtlety is the key.

2. Watch your grammar.

Watch your grammar.

3. And your spelling.

And your spelling.

4. Because if you don’t, that all-important mirror selfie might not have the effect you were hoping for.

Because if you don't, that all-important mirror selfie might not have the effect you were hoping for.

5. Take extra care if your tattoo is intended to be uplifting and inspirational.

Take extra care if your tattoo is intended to be uplifting and inspirational.

6. Because poor spelling tends to undercut the effect somewhat.

Because poor spelling tends to undercut the effect somewhat.

7. Try to avoid anything that could be misconstrued.

Try to avoid anything that could be misconstrued.

8. Especially where children are concerned.

Especially where children are concerned.

9. In fact, kid stuff in general is a no-go area. Bit creepy.

In fact, kid stuff in general is a no-go area. Bit creepy.

10. When using a photo as a guide, accuracy is paramount.

When using a photo as a guide, accuracy is paramount.

11. Pinpoint. Accuracy.

Pinpoint. Accuracy.

12. Can’t stress that one enough.

Can't stress that one enough.

13. If you’re going to get tattooed in a foreign language, it’s advisable to consult a translator beforehand.

If you're going to get tattooed in a foreign language, it's advisable to consult a translator beforehand.

14. Try to avoid internet abbreviations. They won’t age well.

Try to avoid internet abbreviations. They won't age well.

15. In fact any kind of faddish popular reference is best left well alone.

In fact any kind of faddish popular reference is best left well alone.

16. Unless you can be absolutely certain it will stand the test of time.

Unless you can be absolutely certain it will stand the test of time.

17. Song lyrics are another tricky area.

Song lyrics are another tricky area.

18. Because, again, there’s a chance the references might not date terribly well.

Because, again, there's a chance the references might not date terribly well.

19. His and hers tattoos, however, can be delightful.

His and hers tattoos, however, can be delightful.

20. Just make sure yours communicate something meaningful, personal and profound. Like these ones.

Just make sure yours communicate something meaningful, personal and profound. Like these ones.

21. Or these.

Or these.

22. Or these.

Or these.

23. A few subjects to avoid if possible. Firstly: religion.

A few subjects to avoid if possible. Firstly: religion.

24. Animals.

Animals.

25. Politics.

Politics.

26. That applies in the UK, just as it does in America.

That applies in the UK, just as it does in America.

27. Also on the ‘best avoided’ list: Patrick Swayze as a centaur wearing a bowtie.

Also on the 'best avoided' list: Patrick Swayze as a centaur wearing a bowtie.

28. A unicorn humping a dolphin.

A unicorn humping a dolphin.

29. Which bring us to sex. Look, just steer clear of anything to do with sex.

Which bring us to sex. Look, just steer clear of anything to do with sex.

Because no-one comes out of that with their dignity intact.

Because no-one comes out of that with their dignity intact.

See?

See?

30. Still with me? Good. I ought to say a few cautionary words about tattoos of pop stars as well.

Still with me? Good. I ought to say a few cautionary words about tattoos of pop stars as well.

31. Because while they can be a wonderful way to express your devotion…

Because while they can be a wonderful way to express your devotion...

32. Bear in mind that the artist who means so much to you now, may not seem so significant a few years down the line.

Bear in mind that the artist who means so much to you now, may not seem so significant a few years down the line.

33. Like Counting Crows’ ‘Adam Duritz, for example.

Like Counting Crows' 'Adam Duritz, for example.

34. Or Avril Lavigne.

Or Avril Lavigne.

35. Or Nickelback.

Or Nickelback.

36. Or Creed.

Or Creed.

37. Who knows, maybe even this Skrillex tattoo will one day seem ill-advised?

Who knows, maybe even this Skrillex tattoo will one day seem ill-advised?

38. Though if you must get a music-related tattoo, at least choose a flattering image of your idol.

Though if you must get a music-related tattoo, at least choose a flattering image of your idol.

39. One that really captures that musician at their best.

One that really captures that musician at their best.