Nobody cares about your one month anniversary. NOBODY. CARES.
1. They start WAY too early with their smothering love.
GIRL, you are THIRTEEN. SIT DOWN.
2. And they usually have absolutely no idea what’s going on.
4. And they’re pretty much just stupid and awful.
5. They do THIS.
6. And THIS.
7. And they drive you INSANE.
8. Like an overly attached couple at a restaurant.
9. You want to tell them how you really feel. But you hold back.
10. They go to pointless lengths to show their love to the world.
11. And it’s awkward and unpleasant.
12. And mostly they’re just actually insane.
13. Of course, one of them is always more excited than the other. Which is sad.
14. You feel obligated to indulge in their uncomfortable endearments.
15. Their statuses make you feel weird about what their love actually means.
16. They don’t realize why their relationship is awful.
17. But you see the problem. Every day.
18. Then their breakups are all public and sad.
19. And you don’t know what to say…
20. And you hope they’ll just figure out what went wrong…
21. And move on….
22. And find someone new.
23. Even though they’ll probably end up being like every other couple, which is awful and the worst and everybody should just stop.
BYE!
